I won’t build up suspense and make you wait another 200 words for the answer.
Plain and simple, men regret losing a good woman.
You’re probably asking do men regret losing a good woman because you’ve recently separated or are growing distant from your romantic partner.
Your partner is fully aware of who he’s losing.
The reason the relationship faltered may have nothing to do with you. Both high and low-quality men have their reasons for leaving. Reasons that have everything to do with their own internal issues and nothing to do with you.
What matters most, isn’t if he regrets not being with you, but why.
In this article, we’ll categorize men and figure out their reasons for why they regret losing you as well as why they want to return.
What does it mean to be a man of high value?
A high-value man has the following qualities:
A high-value man is the type of guy that even your father would get excited for you to be with.
But even high-quality men can make poor decisions, especially if they’re in pain.
We’re each living our own incredibly complex lives and dealing with dramatic ups and downs.
A high-value man can start to make bad decisions that negatively impact their romantic relationship if their pain becomes unbearable.
This pain bumps them off their path. It makes them question their previous decisions, their relationships, and ultimately can lead to regrettable decisions.
If he comes back he genuinely wants to be with you. He regrets his decision because he’s finally in a place where he understands that he made a mistake.
As you’ll see there are other men that regret losing you for the wrong reasons. He however is now lucid enough to understand both how amazing you are and how much he genuinely cares for you.
Moving forward, it’s important that he effectively addresses the pain that led him to stray. To ensure no relapses in judgment it’s paramount that he works through this pain. Perhaps that means you’ll have to provide added emotional support or that he speaks with a professional.
Whatever method he chooses, for the well-being of the relationship it’s vital that the pain and void he felt is remedied.
Nice guys are just that.
They’re caring, kind, empathetic, and always put others first.
But there’s a certain strain of nice guy that’s lacking in confidence. He’s the kind of guy that will suppress his needs and emotions when faced with conflict.
But when we bottle up negative emotions, we know that inevitably they’re going to come out. These men have the option of proactively dealing with them in a healthy way or repressing them until they boil over and manifest in regrettable ways.
We all know how your nice guy decided to deal with his emotions.
It’s not always clear-cut why a nice guy regrets losing a good woman, especially one that lacks confidence.
It’s very well possible that he regrets losing you because he thinks he won’t be able to find anyone as good as you. This dearth of self-assurance has him fretting over his lack of romantic prospects.
But this isn’t necessarily the case.
It’s more than possible that he understands his slip-up was caused by him and him alone. That he deeply cares for you but let his own lack of self-esteem get in the way. That his misstep was a consequence of his repressed emotions getting the best of him.
He now wants you back because he genuinely cares and loves you.
You’ll have to ask yourself some serious questions in order to determine the next steps. Questions we’ll discuss in just a moment.
But first, let’s talk about the last category that may who stray may fall under.
This is the guy that all your friends warned you about getting serious with.
He’s the antithesis of a high-quality man.
These men lack values, morals, integrity, and basically every other trait you’d want in your ideal partner.
While you and your friends may have a laundry list of profanity-laden names for him, a professional might call him a narcissist or sociopath.
If you’re wondering if he’s a manipulating, low-quality kind of guy, allow me to ask you some questions.
For one, how does he handle the little things?
By this I mean, when you two make plans, does he flake, refuse to message he’s running late, or act courteously?
Does he never clean, cook, or chip in around the house?
Does he refuse to accept blame?
Is he a serial manipulator that makes you question your self-worth?
If you’re struggling to categorize your man, ask friends, family members, or a professional to help you assess his behavior.
This might hurt to hear, but he doesn’t love you.
He doesn’t love you for the unique, amazing woman you are.
It’s not that he loved you as an individual and thus regrets losing you. Rather he regrets losing you because it shatters his already fragile ego.
While on the outside they may glow with confidence, internally they have shallow self-esteem.
Narcissists may lovebomb you and inundate you with gestures of affection in an attempt to win you back. But all those flowers and chocolates aren’t for you. They’re fuel used to feed his brittle ego.
High-quality men genuinely care about their mistakes because they know they hurt you. They have empathy and a desire to be with you because they truly love the person you are.
These men are marriage-worthy.
They have secure attachment styles, values that align with yours, and make for caring partners.
Compare this to low-value men that care more about their ego than they do about you.
Identifying and effectively categorizing men will help you sort out which men are worth investing in and which are worth leaving behind.
But simply knowing which kind of category your man fits into isn’t enough to create a healthy, lasting relationship.
Healing is required in order to create the fertile soil your relationship needs to grow.
You’re here for one reason.
To improve your romantic relationship.
Even if your former relationship has come to an end, you’re still here to learn how to overcome romantic adversity and create more fulfilling future relationships.
I want to help you with that.
Foster the internal healing necessary to fortify self-acceptance and mitigate feelings of self-doubt by honestly answering these questions.
Honestly, this question is terrifying.
If you come to the conclusion that he’s not right for you and that it’s time to move on, so many things may change.
You may have to move out, find a new job, fight for the kids, change cities, file for divorce, and uproot your routine.
That being said, it’s a question you must ask.
To figure out if he’s right for you, ask yourself these follow-up questions:
Should you find out that he’s not the right man you’ll be wracked with anguish.
But there is a positive here.
You’re leaving him because you believe in the possibility of creating a better life.
When describing the end of a relationship I love imaging a tree in the middle of a dense forest.
Your romantic relationship is the tallest tree in the forest. You’ve spent the most time cultivating the relationship and as such it’s grown taller than any other tree in the forest.
When a lightning bolt snaps that tree in half, you’ll be left with a massive hole in the middle of your forest.
But that destruction is needed for something new to take its place.
The light your former relationship was soaking up didn’t allow anything else to grow.
Now you have the chance to grow and cultivate a relationship that’s better than the previous one.
But first, let’s continue to heal.
The questions aren’t getting any easier are they?
This feels wrong.
Why should you have to be the one doing the introspection when he’s the one to blame for the erosion of your relationship?
Perhaps it’s unfair, but the healthiest way to move forward and heal is to examine the situation and learn from it.
Asking yourself what did I learn from this experience will make you a stronger person in the long run.
I’ve learned from many of the women I’ve helped that they’ve depended on their husbands for validation. They get all their emotional, social, and romantic needs met by this one person.
Should that person stray or leave their life, they’re left feeling worthless.
Empower yourself by taking back your sense of self-worth.
The most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one you have with yourself.
Accept who you are.
Accept the bad, the good – accept everything you are.
We’ve been taught to lean on our partners for all our needs and self-worth. Instead, you have to fill yourself with positive energy. Then the relationship becomes an extension of how you feel about yourself.
What gift did this situation give you?
Flip the script and start thinking of this as an opportunity to improve your life.
Crises gift you an opportunity to reevaluate your life.
Accept this gift, unwrap it, and see what’s inside.
It’s incredibly difficult to assess your relationship and figure out if your man is worth staying with.
To help you, I’ve designed my Authentic Relationship System Training Program.
Through my hybrid course (video curriculum, worksheets, and sessions) you’ll learn how to save your marriage or move on with confidence by understanding male psychology and boosting your self-esteem.
I’d like to learn more about the romantic obstacles you’re facing.
Let’s have a 1-on-1 call where I learn more about your obstacles and where we determine if my class is a fit for you.
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